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Old 12-07-2011, 04:19 PM   #1
cry0fth3carr0ts
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i banged an ugly chick last night...

it was bad. help me cope.



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Old 12-07-2011, 04:21 PM   #2
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Take comfort in knowing that she was the best you will ever get
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Old 12-07-2011, 04:56 PM   #3
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gross dude, you banged skeet?
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Old 12-07-2011, 04:58 PM   #4
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At least tell me you were top, or did Skeet dominate?
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Old 12-07-2011, 05:22 PM   #5
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He's gonna post a video now for that.
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Old 12-07-2011, 06:27 PM   #6
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I'd bang skeet, just so we could go out for beers afterward and laugh at women for not having dicks.
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Old 12-07-2011, 06:28 PM   #7
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Pics?
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Old 12-07-2011, 06:55 PM   #8
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gross dude, you banged skeet?
fuck... i wish.

basically this chick was chubby and ugly but she had some pretty nice tits. i tried to focus on the tits. slapping them around and ignoring whatever it was that she was saying. eventually i looked up at her gross weird face and then down at her belly bouncing around and just said, "fuck this, what am i doing? i'm taking you home. i don't want this."

i'm better than this. skeet, don't be upset with me...
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Old 12-07-2011, 06:56 PM   #9
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i literally lol'd

10/10 story. would read again.
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Old 12-07-2011, 07:11 PM   #10
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i literally lol'd

10/10 story. would read again.
Agreed. Good posts = lulz.
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Old 12-07-2011, 07:13 PM   #11
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were you drunk?
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Old 12-07-2011, 07:17 PM   #12
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it was bad. help me cope.






beat them cheeks
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Old 12-07-2011, 07:28 PM   #13
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were you drunk?
oh yeah. see, the idea was that me and my buddy were going to get drunk enough to try to double team this chick but like i said she was really ugly so we had to drink a lot to be drunk enough to bang on this chick.

i think my friend couldn't get drunk enough and so we just started talking about having a threesome very crudely in front of her. she wasn't leaving so we figured she was down with it but then my friend dipped out or something... this is all very vague... i don't know exactly when he left.

then she had her shirt off and i was having a good ol time playing with some big boobies when it dawned on me that we were banging... i stopped doing that as soon as my brain caught up with what was happening. i went upstairs and washed my dick and took some shots before i drove her home. like a gentleman..
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Old 12-07-2011, 08:31 PM   #14
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If it makes you feel any better, about two weeks ago I was lactated on by a smoker woman in her late 50's at a bar. She has fake boobs that are nice. Didn't know how to react... laugh? Look away? I'm not a faggot, so I took it like a man and got breast milk on my hand. I then wiped it on my friend. I think my story is more horrifying.
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Old 12-07-2011, 08:42 PM   #15
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v-card thread, congrats dude. We all lost it to a fat chick.
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Old 12-07-2011, 08:52 PM   #16
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Take comfort in knowing that she was the best you will ever get
loled
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Old 12-07-2011, 10:10 PM   #17
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reads thread title. "ho boy, I know where this is going..." Utterly shocked to NOT see a growing gallery of ugly freak porn.
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Old 12-07-2011, 10:16 PM   #18
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We all lost it to a fat chick.
More people have said this about you no doubt--so ironic of you to weigh in on this.

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Old 12-07-2011, 10:22 PM   #19
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i'm better than this.
idk, are you?

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Old 12-07-2011, 10:32 PM   #20
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I ate my gf out, then fucked her and didn't feel like cry0fth3carr0ts.

/win thread
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Old 12-07-2011, 10:47 PM   #21
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idk, are you?

life imitating art
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:30 PM   #22
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:41 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by cry0fth3carr0ts View Post
oh yeah. see, the idea was that me and my buddy were going to get drunk enough to try to double team this chick but like i said she was really ugly so we had to drink a lot to be drunk enough to bang on this chick.

i think my friend couldn't get drunk enough and so we just started talking about having a threesome very crudely in front of her. she wasn't leaving so we figured she was down with it but then my friend dipped out or something... this is all very vague... i don't know exactly when he left.

then she had her shirt off and i was having a good ol time playing with some big boobies when it dawned on me that we were banging... i stopped doing that as soon as my brain caught up with what was happening. i went upstairs and washed my dick and took some shots before i drove her home. like a gentleman..
just think:




you probably kissed her too.
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Old 12-07-2011, 11:42 PM   #24
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Any guy can fuck a beautiful woman. It takes a real man to fuck a beast.

Way to go dude.

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Old 12-08-2011, 12:23 AM   #25
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More people have said this about you no doubt--so ironic of you to weigh in on this.

I'd hate to think what you lost your v-card to, you couldn't even attract the opposite sex.
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Old 12-08-2011, 12:25 AM   #26
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dis thread
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Old 12-08-2011, 12:35 AM   #27
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I'd hate to think what you lost your v-card to, you couldn't even attract the opposite sex.
ahahahaha
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Old 12-08-2011, 12:40 AM   #28
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So Skeet, I have to know, what is it you look for in a sexual partner? Do you enjoy having sex with the ladies or do you go for just men, or both or what?
This is actually an interesting question. Should be answered.
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Old 12-08-2011, 01:12 AM   #29
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This is actually an interesting question. Should be answered.
nah, prob not gonna happen. we'll just get another arbitrary buttplug in the anus or dick in the butthole of elitism.
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Old 12-08-2011, 01:26 AM   #30
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nah, prob not gonna happen. we'll just get another arbitrary buttplug in the anus
Carrots could use some cheering up though
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